My evil side starts to overtake my self… I’m getting far away from Bhagawan and it seems it’s hard for me to control my emotion again. I was in training and I thought I passed. But I’m not!
No need to blame anyone on what happen to me. I myself need to make a move!
Monday – Friday
I will arrive at home basically at 8 p.m. then take my dinner, bath and pray and it should finish at 10.30 p.m. then I will talk to PC until 12 p.m. then continue to read Bhawan literature until 1 a.m. then go to sleep. Wake up at 5 a.m. getting ready 1 hour, pray and breakfast 30 min, then ol 30 min.
Saturday
I will arrive at home around 5 p.m. then take bath, dinner, pray it should be finished around 8 p.m. Prepare for SSEHV around 1 hour. 9 p.m. free time ---> either talk to PC or practice for Baba B’day.
Sunday
Bhagawan’s day
Can I follow this guideline? Swami I don’t have any idea. Now, PC involves in my life so at least he must agree, if no. I don’t know what to do.
This is so ridiculous that I see myself such an inresponsible lady. When infront of Nova, Sarika, Mewin, Rajen, Appa and Ne Krishna, I don’t know what I’m going to do.
This is weird, I’m so focus on my work at the school. I make Swami’s work the second priority. Hmm.. I’m speechless…
He never let me down.. that’s the only thing I believe. :)
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